An easy, mindless, carefree pregnancy has been taken from me. I know I’ve seen other people who’re pregnant after infertility say the same thing, so I know that I’m not alone, or even crazy. It’s just the way it is. You can’t go through the trauma of multiple losses, and then just keep on expecting everything is going to be just peachy this one time. So right now, the next milestone is the second beta. Then it’ll be the 7 week ultrasound to look for a heartbeat. Then it’ll be to make it to 12 weeks, then it’ll be to make it until the baby will be viable outside of the womb, even if it is with medical intervention. Then it’ll be to make it as long as possible, because we all know that every day is important for growth and the health of our baby, up until birth. So yes, I am happy, I am excited, but I’ll always be holding my breath til the next benchmark. It’s just the way it is.


Beta-HCG – 95.2. This point in time the last time I went in for a beta, which turned out to be a chemical pregnancy, it was 18.4, so definitely an improvement! I will go in on Wednesday to make sure that number rises at the rate it is supposed to. I’m feeling a bit better now, but I’ll feel way better Wednesday.


I took a test this morning and there was a very, very faint line! My mom saw it too, so I’m not just crazy. Now, I’m not really all that excited yet. Past experiences and whatnot. I’ll test again Monday and hope that the line gets darker. I’ll probably go in for a beta then too.